Just last year, I told myself that I must now devote myself to my career. I thought, and rightly, it was time for me to find a job I love in a friendly environment. I did not want to live what I lived there or not so long ago. Over the past two years, I flit from one environment to another. I liked each of these libraries. I finally found myself in my element, one that I experienced early in my career which I had removed. My confidence came back. I learned to cope with the constant innovation and all the new people I met during these last 2 years. When, last March, my love has said yes to a baby, I told myself that I have time to set aside work before it arrives in my belly. I expected several months of practice. My little miracle found home much sooner than I expected. Three weeks after the yes dear, I tested positive. I was so surprised but very happy. The career was going to wait and it was fine. Finally, I thought that was what was the past. But luck knocked on my door at the end of May. I finally have a job in a library. I love my job and the team is really great. Since I am pregnant, I am very calm. The stress is over and I almost blind trust in the future. His presence in me gives me comfort. As if he was there to tell me he is taking life one day at a time and must enjoy every moment. I Zen feel and hassle are quickly discarded. I call my baby lucky. At the beginning of my pregnancy, I was afraid. Fear of reliving the horror of my last birth, fear that this child with Down syndrome is due to my age, fear of losing it. All these fears have been dismissed because my doctor had the same fears for me and it made me spend lots of tests. Since I am calm and confident. Monday will be my ultrasound. I'm sure it's a little boy who made himself a nest in the hollow of my belly. I can not wait to see if my feeling again will prove correct. Children accompany us. They count the sleeps. We involve them as much as possible in this pregnancy because I want them to know we love them as much when their brother (or sister) arrives. I find it so nice to see my sweetie flatter belly and talked to the baby. I find it so nice to hear my son tell me that he will take care of the baby in the morning. It will be very pampered and loved this baby. I savor every moment. Thank you life, thank you for my baby lucky.
